How To Find Happiness In Times Of Grief and Loss
"How do I get over my constant feelings of grief? It won't go away."
"I want to find some sort of happiness amidst my grief."
"Can it get any worse than this? I deserve a little joy in my life."
"I'm devastated, but I know I need to move forward and let the pain subside."
Grief is as much a part of life as happiness.
It's difficult to accept, but true.
You can't have light without darkness.
Happiness can't exist without grief.
Unfortunately, grief can have a strong, long lasting negative impact on your entire life. You may neglect those that are close to you and still need your attention and love. Your work and your health may suffer.
Learning how to handle grief in a positive way is a very valuable life skill.
In the long run, grief can actually provide the seeds for happiness, if you know how to nurture them.
In times of grief, here are eight ways to make the best of the situation:
One of the best things anyone can do each day is to make a gratitude list. List all the things that are good in your life. Focusing on the positive lessens the blow of grief.
What are you grateful for?
Focus on the things you can control.
We spend much of our lives worrying over things beyond our control. This is time and energy that's simply wasted. Enjoy your loved ones. Spend time with them making new memories and laughing about the old. Focus.
What can you control and focus on?
Focus on the people you still have in your life.
Your relationships are the only thing that will really matter to you at the end of your life. Let your loved ones know just how much they mean to you.
- Make that phone call and write that letter you've been putting off. One day, it really will be too late. There's no point in keeping your love to yourself.
Who do you still have in your life?
Rely on your religion or spirituality.
Grief can be a great impetus to strengthening or beginning your spiritual life. Now might be the perfect time to go back to church or join a meditation class. There is a strength and support available from the Divine that you may have been neglecting for a while.
How spiritual are you? Take time to pursue or strengthen your beliefs.
Remember the good things.
When someone is gone, we still have access to many wonderful memories. Remember the good times together and the loving moments.
What good memories do you have?
Rely on your friends and family for support.
Friends and family can help. Sharing adversity brings people closer together. That's why old war buddies are always there for each other. It's same reason why doctors remain close with their former medical school classmates.
Sharing your grief with others is a strong bonding experience. It's one more opportunity to bring positivity to difficult times.
Who can you rely on for support?
Honor the memory.
Do something in memory of your loved one. Did they adore children? Perhaps you could volunteer with a local children's charity.
How can you honor their memory?
Allow the grief to turn into something positive.
Spend some time considering what's important in your life and make some positive changes. Perhaps you'll spend more time with your children, take that Mediterranean cruise, or move closer to your family.
How can you turn this into a positive?
Everyone has to deal with grief at some point. It's inevitable.
However, taking these steps will both lessen the grief and enable you to get something positive from it.
So as challenging as it may be to move forward, go slowly, and keep moving in a positive direction. You will find some good things to be found during times of grief, if you look hard enough.
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