Get to know yourself better.

One big obstacle that may hold you back from living the life you deserve is a lack of knowledge of who you are. Sit down with a pen and paper, and ask yourself these questions:

• What would you dare to attempt if you knew it was impossible for you to fail?
• What are your dreams? What did you dream about doing and becoming as a child? What have you always wanted to attempt?
• What are your talents? What do your friends and family say you're good at? What abilities have you received compliments on?
• What are you excited about in your life right now? What's great about your life?
• What parts of your life do you wish to improve? What steps can you take to improve those areas? Whose help could you enlist?
• When you begin to get clear on who you are, what's important to you, and where you're headed, you'll begin to feel empowered and in control of your destiny. This confidence seeps into every area of your life.
• Allow your passions to fuel your confidence and stir you to action that will move you forward in the direction of your dreams.

Learn from someone who's already successful.

Confidence breeds success. As you accomplish the things you set out to achieve, your confidence in your abilities will grow. You can experience this increasing confidence by trial and error. Or, you can shorten the learning curve dramatically through a mentor.

• Find the person who's the best at what you're trying to accomplish. Approach that person and ask them to show you the ropes. Ask them to show you how they arrived at their success and how they maintain it. With a mentor, your chances of success increase dramatically, thereby strengthening your confidence.

Fake it.

One of the quickest ways to gain confidence is to pretend you're confident already. It may seem silly at first, but if you begin to move your body and speak like you would if you were confident, you'll quickly gain self-confidence.

• How fast does a confident person speak?
• At what volume does he speak?
• How does he gesture with his hands?
• How fast does he walk?
• How does he move his body?
• Pretend you're confident by moving your body in confident ways. Your motions will follow the movement of your body.

Think about the 3 toughest things you've ever done in your life.

You were successful in coming through those crises. By mentally exploring these events, you'll learn about how you found your confidence in those instances. Now that's knowledge you can use.

• Whenever you lack confidence, reflect on those tough times and the strategies you utilized to get through them.
• Feeling self-assured comes with knowing that you can make it through difficult times and emerge triumphant.

What are your most significant achievements?

Take some moments to survey your life. Whether it's teaching yourself how to take proper care of your lawn or reading the entire collection of Shakespeare, recognize that you've achieved all kinds of milestones.

• Then, reflect on your achievements and let yourself feel proud. Re-connect with the feelings of self-assurance you experienced at those times. Feel your confidence grow.
• Finally, allow yourself to look forward to a future filled with still more achievement.

Understand your mistakes.

An important aspect of finding your confidence is examining what you've done in the past that you now see as a mistake. Thoroughly understanding your prior errors is integral to developing your sense of self-assuredness.

• Reviewing your mistakes allows you to say to yourself that you understand what happened and that you know now to approach those situations differently. Knowing what you did wrong and recognizing that you wouldn't do it the same way again builds confidence. 
• When you realize that you've gained some applicable knowledge, you also strengthen your confidence that you can meet any challenge in the future.

Find a role model.

You probably know someone who you believe exhibits great confidence. Using them as a role model can be instrumental in finding your own confidence.

• What does your role model's self-assurance look like? Does the person make eye contact when speaking to others? Can you see a comfortable ease with which he relates to others? Think about how the person you have in mind looks, acts, and talks. 
• Perhaps your role model has a great sense of humor. The self-assured person isn't afraid to admit he's made a mistake. He may even gently laugh at himself for his errors. 
• Now, try behaving like your role model. You truly can live your way into a new way of thinking. If you emulate the person whom you view as confident, you'll be more likely to exude self-assurance yourself.
• Even when you're experiencing a challenge and aren't feeling too sure about yourself, try "faking it till you make it." Use your knowledge about how confidence appears and behave that way. Soon after, you'll begin to recognize and connect with your own true confidence.

Make a list of your strong points.

What character traits do you have to offer that are of great benefit to you or others?

• Are you patient, kind or caring? Identify personality characteristics that you're proud of. Ponder your strong points. Knowing yourself will enhance your self confidence.

Choose optimism as a daily approach to everything.

Strive to be positive in life's journey.

• When you make the decision to find the best in whatever life brings you, your self confidence will soar.

In your daily life, notice when you do something well.

Perhaps you just cleaned up your car and it looks awesome. Maybe you completed a report and it's the best you've ever written.

• Recognize each day the times when you excel. Perhaps you helped your child through a difficult time or you made a great chocolate cake.
• Little efforts add up to build your self confidence.

Celebrate your progress.

Take notice of your good fortune.

• When you've met or surpassed your goals, celebrate! Rejoice in your own successes. Congratulate yourself as you build the self confidence you seek.